With my addiction comes varying layers and levels and intensities of guilt and shame. Guilt was recently explained to me as, “you did something bad,” whereas shame can be described as, “you are bad.” At my core, I know I’m more than anything my addiction tries to tell me I am or has me believe. One thing I find that helps release some of the shame for actions past [heck, for even having an addiction at all] is writing. And more recently, it’s been writing letters of forgiveness to myself.
This holiday season was different for my family and I as I took some time away to work on my mental and physical health. And in doing so I wrote a forgiveness letter to myself I felt like sharing on here because I know I’m not the only person out there who is hard on themselves. If you can relate, please reply back. And know that I’m in your corner fighting for your peace, serenity, and light, always.
If there’s one thing everyone in your circle can agree on, it’s that you don’t give up the fight. Your life certainly has had it’s ups and downs, and while you numbed both the ups and downs with a substance, now you know better. And when you know better, you have a chance to do better. While your past is something you’re not proud of, cherish the moments and the people that you have met along the way. You’ve been led all along by a God who loves you [and loves your children even more]. Honor the lessons you’ve learned and the people who helped you learn them. Honor the journey your soul has mapped out for you. Trust it’s not over yet. And most of all, don’t stop fighting for YOU.
One more thing: that was then, GRACE is NOW.