As parents, we often dream of our children following in our footsteps – maybe playing the same sports we loved or pursuing the hobbies that shaped our own childhoods. But sometimes, the most beautiful moments of parenthood come when our children lead us down unexpected paths. That’s exactly what happened when Lily decided this was the fall she was going to try cheerleading.
I was a former soccer player who barely knew the difference between a toe touch and a tumble. Cheerleading wasn’t just outside my comfort zone – it was in another zip code entirely. For those of you who had the pleasure of growing up with little Katie Caputo, you might recall there was nothing quiet, sweet, or calm about her on the soccer field. When Lily was born, I envisioned that same fierce girl on soccer fields or basketball courts for years to come. While it’s true Lily keeps up with her brother’s just like, “one of the guys,” cheerleading has become a sport that all of the Serbinski’s have come to appreciate and take part in.
When my daughter first approached me about joining the Birmingham Patriots Freshman Cheer team, I’ll admit I had my reservations. Like many, I carried those tired stereotypes about cheerleading – that it was all pom-poms and popularity contests. Looking back now, I couldn’t have been more wrong, and I’m almost embarrassed by my initial hesitation.
The Beginning of Our Journey
That first game changed everything. As I watched from the sidelines, I saw my daughter and her teammates working harder than I’d ever imagined. They weren’t just learning cheers; they were building strength, developing coordination, and mastering complex stunts that required incredible trust and teamwork.
What struck me most was the immediate sense of community. Other cheer moms, seasoned veterans of the sport, welcomed me with open arms. They shared their own first-time experiences, offered advice, and quickly became my go-to support system. Those early-morning game drives and late-night practice pickups turned into opportunities for coffee runs and conversations.
More Than Just a Sport
As the season progressed, I watched in awe as my daughter transformed. The shy girl who once hesitated to raise her hand in class was now confidently calling out cheers and encouraging her teammates. She learned valuable lessons about dedication, time management, and the importance of supporting others – skills that extended far beyond the mat.
The friendships she formed weren’t the superficial relationships I’d wrongly anticipated. These girls lifted each other up – literally and figuratively. They celebrated each other’s successes and provided comfort during setbacks.
The Competition Experience
Nothing could have prepared me for the excitement of the big “Cheer Off” competition day. 13 teams came together to compete in cheer and dance routines. I found myself cheering just as loudly as any lifelong cheer parent, my heart racing with every stunt and tumbling pass.
But what touched me most was watching the teams support each other when winners were announced. Despite being competitors, squads from different schools would cheer each other on and offer genuine congratulations. It wasn’t just about winning; it was about celebrating the sport they all loved.
Valuable Lessons from the Sidelines
Looking back on our first season, I realize how much we both learned along the way..
1. The Power of Preparation
I never knew how much went into getting ready for a two-and-a-half-minute routine. From perfectly styled hair to synchronized movements, every detail matters.
2. True Strength Comes in Many Forms
Cheerleading challenged my perception of strength. Yes, it requires physical strength to perform stunts and tumbling, but it also demands mental fortitude, emotional resilience, and unwavering trust in teammates.
3. The Art of Time Management
Between practices, competitions, schoolwork, and maintaining a social life, Lily learned to juggle multiple responsibilities.
4. The Reality of Commitment
There were days when we both felt exhausted. But we learned that commitment means showing up even when it’s difficult. The pride in following through has been immeasurable.
5. Grace Under Pressure
Whether dealing with pre-competition jitters or recovering from a dropped stunt, the sport taught us both how to handle pressure with grace. I’ve watched my daughter develop remarkable poise and resilience that extends far beyond cheerleading.
Breaking Through My Own Barriers
I have to be honest – walking into that first parent meeting was harder than I’d like to admit. As a divorced mom in recovery, my mind was an expert at playing those old familiar tapes: “You don’t belong here. These moms won’t accept you. You’re not good enough.” I’d spent years rebuilding my life, taking it one day at a time, but something about entering this new chapter triggered all my old insecurities.
I imagined the other moms would somehow sense my past, that they’d form their perfect little circles and leave me on the outside looking in. After all, isn’t that what we tell ourselves when we’re carrying the weight of our history? That somehow our struggles are written across our foreheads for everyone to see?
But here’s what actually happened: Nothing. And everything.
They didn’t care about my past; they cared about who I was showing up as today – a mom who loved her daughter fiercely and was trying her best to support her dreams. In fact, my journey through recovery has given me tools that unexpectedly came in handy in the cheer mom world: taking things one day at a time, finding strength in community, and believing in the power of progress over perfection.
My daughter watched me face these fears, though she didn’t always know exactly what I was battling. She saw me build friendships, step into volunteer roles, and gradually find my place in this new community. Without realizing it, I was teaching her something powerful: that it’s never too late to start again, that our past doesn’t define our future, and that sometimes the very things that scare us most can lead to our greatest joy.
A New Chapter in Our Journey Together
Looking back on this transformative year, I realize that cheerleading has given me so much more than just a new appreciation for a sport. It’s given me countless precious hours with my daughter during car rides to practice, opportunities to celebrate her victories (both big and small), and chances to comfort her through challenges. In supporting her passion, I discovered a whole new way to connect with her during these precious years when many parents find their children drifting away.
To parents everywhere: our children’s interests might sometimes surprise us, challenge us, or even confuse us. But when we open our hearts to their passions, magical things happen. We don’t just become supporters of their dreams – we become partners in their journey. Whether it’s cheerleading, chess club, debate team, or any other activity that lights up their world, embracing what brings them joy can deepen our bonds in ways we never expected.
As we look forward to another season of high ponytails, glitter, and stunning routines, I’m grateful not just for what this sport has taught my daughter, but for how it’s transformed our relationship. I’ve learned that being a parent isn’t about steering our children toward our interests – it’s about letting them steer us toward theirs and finding joy together along the way.
Here’s to the unexpected journeys that bring us closer to our children, one cheer at a time.
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