Mom to Mom Nutrition

Katie Serbinski, M.S., R.D., is a registered dietitian and millennial mom, blogging about healthy recipes, child and mom nutrition, and motherhood.

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Home » Mom Life » Fighting the Fall Blues

Fighting the Fall Blues

Oct 26, 2020 2 Comments

It pains me to write the title and copy in this blog post because the fall is MY time of year. From football to food to family and yes, my birthday, I’ve always had a special place for the fall in my heart and soul. But here’s the thing: I haven’t felt like myself the past few weeks. And while I can sit here and point my finger at things like relationship changes, school happenings, work schedules, etc. I can’t negate the fact that my mood and sense of self has been getting worse, not better. I’m doing all the things I should be doing: recovery, exercise, eating well, sleep. Until I realize I wasn’t doing any of those things AT ALL this past week. Except recovery- which yes, is still a HUGE positive.

Recovery Zoom meeting with a toddler. Going as well as it should…

I found myself at meetings sobbing, calling my sponsor, sobbing, sleeping poorly, not getting out of bed, and stomaching a few Sanders chocolate caramels before bed. Oh and, I cried to a few Mom friends at the park too. While it’s easy to sit here and say, “well yeah Katie, go figure, you’ve had a lot going on this past year and it’s finally catching up with you!” I think there’s validity to that. But there’s also a lot of power and validity in verbalizing this: I struggle with seasonal depression.

I remember being a freshman at Michigan State University and not being able to get out of bed. Skipping class. And ultimately getting boosts of serotonin from drinking, binging and purging, and drinking some more. Eeek! Gross. Fast forward to the past few years and between having babies and struggling with my alcohol use, it’s no wonder my body hasn’t been able to regulate chemicals and hormones. Now that I finally feel like this year I’m on a solid path to recovery, this seasonal change hit me like a bus. I was not prepared. I was not taking my medication. I was headed down a slippery emotional slope. I knew I had to do something.

Move a muscle, change a thought. That’s what I learn in recovery. And from this guy. Except he takes the moving muscles to the extreme!

So, I did what I do best: I TALKED. I talked to my parents. To my sponsor. To friends in recovery. To my therapist. To my family doctor. And yes, to the kids. Because Mommy’s been really sad and wants to get better. And knows there are tools to help her get that way.

So, here’s my plan of action:

  • I’m back on my medications and vitamin regimen
  • I’m at my parents with the kids for the week for extra support
  • I’m letting those close to me know my feelings and/or how they can support me
  • I’m considering a shower, a walk, or a big bowl of spaghetti a win

I’m being honest with you guys. Because many of you have been with me from the start of my post-partum blues, alcoholism, and now separation. Thanks for making this a no-judgment zone. From one Mom hanging in there to another: You’ve got a friend in me. Even when it takes a few hours or days for me to reply. Just know I’m in your corner like you’ve always been in mine!

With the holidays right around the corner I want to be my best self for MYSELF, and my Four Tops. Santa is watching all of us 😉

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Comments

  1. Colette says

    October 27, 2020 at 7:38 am

    I usually don’t comment (I probably should more, especially on great recipes!), but I just wanted to say, that it was brave of you to write this post! I don’t really have any great words of wisdom, you seem to have a great support team and know everything you are ‘supposed’ to do. I can’t imagine anyone at this present time feeling really ‘happy’ with all that is going on. I wonder how I, myself, am going to get through winter…but I know I will (we will). I do know that is always does get better, even if it isn’t right away. I also know depression is more about dealing with the past and anxiety is more about the future. Anyway, you have some great recipes, and I truly hope you continue on the path to wellness.

    Reply
  2. Becky says

    October 27, 2020 at 12:23 pm

    Katie, please know please care about you and your adorable family! Sending prayers! One day at a time…

    Reply

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Katie Serbinski at Mom to Mom Nutrition

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Hi, I’m Katie! Registered Dietitian, Mom, and Mealtime Negotiator. I’m on a mission to make mealtime happier, healthier, and easier with small children, despite what my 4 picky eaters have me believing. From family-friendly recipes to confessions about my unfiltered motherhood moments, I hope you grab a seat at my kitchen table!
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